Wedding uninvite

My former SIL is getting married and she really wants to have all the kids in her wedding procession entourage. You know, wee one as ring bearer, wee bitty as flower girl and wee pea as her co flower girl (although she can't walk, much less hold a basket. besides the point I guess?) Anyway, she is getting married in far away location, and she wants me to pay to bring my children to said location, and get them dressed in expensive dresses and shoes (which she picks, but I buy) and then wants me to bring them to the wedding, but I am not invited to stay. In fact, I am invited to supply and pay my own babysitter to watch the kids at teh reception or she has graciously offered ot allow me to pick them up after the ceremony and cart them back to the hotel room I am supposed to pay for. Am I allowed to say HELL NO SUCKERS? Or is that too rude to my husband's memory? I find myself asking myself "WWMFD?" What would Mr. Funky Do? And then I realize, if Mr. Funky was here, I'd be forced to go the wedding, so maybe this is my little saving grace. Not having to go.